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Like any decent citizen in this universe, I am a bit ashamed of myself and my thoughts. But I've noticed that whenever I write in English, the shame isn't quite as bad. I can distance myself from my words by using a language that I barely know and don't quite master. Maybe that's just it. I can't notice my mistakes in English, because I don't know the language.

I am not planning to switch to English here on Aivoröyhtäisyjä, but if the primary argument for writing in one's own language is that it's easier, then I definitely should consider switching to English. It's way easier for me. Only for psychological reasons, of course, but they're the ones that really count.

Just a thought.

Which leads to me thinking, yet again, that I might need to ask myself whether this writing-thing is worth the shame it carries, but as soon as I notice myself thinking about it, I suddenly remember that shame is one's self-healing-process. Whenever you feel ashamed, you know that you are wrong, that there's a defect in you. Then you can start fixing yourself.

If we always just avoided shameful things, we'd never know what we're bad at. We'd never know what others really find irritating in us.